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Heidi Yang

Pain:Part 1

So far away, Iíve been changiní but youíll never see me now. Iíve been blaminí but youíll never see me now.-So Far Away by Crossfade

Iíve been changiní but youíll never see me now
Iím on my knees begginí please save me
Wonít you save me? Savingís what I need, Ďcause I just wanna be by your sideÖSave Me by Hanson

Free me from my pain
That seems eternal
It haunts my dreams
But mostly my nightmares
Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right, maybe in a different! life you could see me stand on my own again,
You are the antidote tat got me through, you are the antidote that got me high
I used to see you as my friend and my lover
Now you are just my tourniquet,
I want so much to hate you right now
So I can heal my tortured bleeding soul
But for some strange reason I canít,
Am I not far enough removed from the situation?
Perhaps the pain is still too fresh for us
Why must it be this way?
Why do I still want you?
I miss you, I love you, and Iíll see you soonÖhow true those words ring in my ears,
Iím surrounded by those I love (or used to at least) yet I feel so incredibly alone
I want to die
To be reborn from the ashes of my former self
My own mythical Phoenix,
I donít know where to turn
Help me find my way along this dark shadowy treacherous path,
Become my Aragorn and lead the traitorous undead to slay our personal demons
Demons we cannot possibly fight alone,
Why must the Devil prey on our minds, stab our hearts, and steal our souls?
Why does God seem to forsake us in our hour of need?
We walk through this world like robots in a Gundam episode
Waiting for someone to cross us
So we can use our big fancy guns,
Safe in our suit of armor
We can longer get hurt
We cannot feel happiness, but we are also free from pain
Suddenly we transform once again, into a vagabond samurai
Wandering aimlessly
Serving justice where we see fit
Preying on young men and women that are our comrades
Yet something is still something,
Whatever happened to finding, having, caring, sharing, needing, and deserving
True love?


Part 2

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