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To My Protester Friends


Tom Tannehill

Ladies and Gentlemen I gotta be blunt
I honestly think that dog won't hunt.
And I'm of this particular opinion
That the majority of this Union
Think you're full of crap in a handbag
I hope my meaning ain't too vague.

But in case it is, let me spell it out
You ain't welcome, but if you head about
Fifty miles due north from here
There's kindred spirits so I hear
And you can bitch with all your might
'bout your loss of rights, they'll be polite.

But here in this ole' Texas town
We'd prefer you're kind not be around
We're pretty proud Americans
Who don't think much of Afghanistan
For harboring terrorists like Ben Laden
Who kill five thousand countrymen

So you might as well be going now
I'd suggest some place like... maybe Hankow.
I'm sure in China you'll be welcome
Although they're not that big on freedom.
But, I bet that you can work that out,
Just demand your rights. You scream and shout!

And, since Chinese are an accepting lot
I'd suggest you stage a large boycott
In Peking, that regime's sure fair,
Just bring your signs to Tienemen Square.
So I really hope my meaning's clear
That you get your asses outta here.

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