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The Wardrobe of A Church -- Chapter One
As I approached Immaculate Conception Roman Catholic Church in Montclair, I was
conjectured at the many vehicles parking in its lot for the Sunday service,
along with its architectural features. Ah, what a chritudinous church, the most
prized of all in this town, if not the most unusual in architecture in New
Jersey. As I entered it the interior was mind-boggling as it provided resonance
for the pipe organ and the choir doing an elated rendition of "Holy, Holy,
Holy." A majestic complexion impacted me as the final chord played by the
prodigious pipe organ fulminated gloriously.
The whole service ran through manageably, but I see some flaws in the dress
code. I spotted a family of Montclair High School Mountie fans wear shorts,
which were prohibited in church, even at this building's type of atmosphere.
Also a group of students from the same school were out of place because they are
wearing T-shirt about their interest, usually the ones offending Our Creator. A
sordid faction of the worshippers were dressed in their Sunday merit,
particularly pre-K girls who were bedecked in their pleated dresses with pouf
sleeves, black dress shoes with buckles, and lace-trimmed socks. I was
wondering, as I listened to the sermons, if they would have dressed more
modestly, they would have been as cordial as those girls.
After the service, I told the imperfectly dressed worshippers to remain in the
building for a lecture. As they remained in their pews, they sat as still as
miniature statues. My lecture, so persuasive and eloquent, gives them the
message about how to dress like a Catholic, but they slept, yawned, and stared
into space while it proceeded.
"Brothers and sisters," I retorted, "did you not see what's wrong with you? Did
you not perceive the garments you wear today are off limits in this church?
Didn't you know that Our Creator has a time and place not to wear them? I, as a
Catholic, could not bear this dilemma! I know what are you doing; you are
But my lecture abruptly concluded with comments from criticizing Montclair High
students and they told me that this is too much. They told me that traditional
church wardrobe was too flattering, if not banal and outdated. They also
postulated that "this is for the rookies." I, on the other hand, knew that it
has something to do with the third Commandment: to keep religious days modest to
Our Creator. I left church when the criticizing warbled continuously,
discontented and dismal.
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