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Going Under The Rainbow
by
Mira Minkova
I took the final decision that I'm going to make it in that day when one whole
hour I was waiting in the traffic jam at Orlov Most. I was deadly tired. That is
the fourth job that I'm starting for the past two months - I was security at a
bank, before that I was a baker... now I'm working at a warehouse. Such jobs do
not suit me... man's jobs. That was why I decided I'll make it. Society never
accepts you the way you are. And in my mind I am different, not like that.
The cars started moving and the Volkswagen quickly plunged in front of the bus
staying at the right.
"I'll do it! Damned, I'll do it!" - somebody blew the horn from behind - "C'mon,
asshole, drive!"
"...and I will not listen to them swearing, and I won't listen to her bitching,
and I will not have to do things with the kids... I never wanted them!"
After he squeezed out near the stadium he turned right to where he had first
thought of that - "Change It", the only company making such researches and
tests.
"If I get in Friday, Monday I'll be a new person! I'll find a more decent work -
say, in a company... no, first I'll have to find a place to live... but I'll
think about that later!"
He reached there in no time. He turned to the half-empty parking area and he
looked at the clock at the player - ten minutes to six. They must be here. The
building was small, with three or four floors and seemed somehow not suiting the
shining business centers around. Even from the spacious parking it could be seen
the fallen plaster around the windows. He locked the car's door after five
minutes he had been banging it to close, and with a fast walk he went to the
entrance. At the right side of the door there was a blue-white board at which it
was written "Don't think more, the time is now!"
"Welcome!" - said the friendly receptionist. "How can I help you?"
Yakob had already grabbed one of the brochures and he was squeezing it in his
hands as if it was a scepter, "Can I, can I enter now?"
The receptionist smiled ever kinder than before "Volunteer?"
"Yes."
"You can enter immediately after filling the test. It will guarantee that you
are suitable...", Yakob took a survey of the premises, "...And also a
declaration that you agree with and will take the risks."
"Can I do that now?"
The receptionist stood up of his place "Please, follow me."
It was then when I thought how much all of this looks like a computer game, you
know - like Lara Kroft . But not exactly... one of those where you can choose
the character you'll be. I made the choice. While I was walking after the
receptionist the room seemed enormous to me. There were only two doors - the one
that I entered through and the one that I was now going to. That was a two-wing
door with darken windows. Being negligent from outside, inside the building was
even luxurious. In the middle of the hall there was a dark-red carpet, like the
ones for the important guests which didn't reach neither of the two doors
however, it was put on the other diagonal. The floor was glistening with its
slabstones of marble and granite, put like at a chess. And from both the sides
of the door there were two big horses of marble, chessmen.
The receptionist opened the door for me, "Please."
I went into a well lighted corridor which was divided at two several steps
forward. "At the left, please", the receptionist directed me, "here they'll take
care of your documents".
At the left there was only one door, right in front of me. I stopped next to it
and the receptionist passed by me to open it, "Come in, come in."
Next to the window there was a woman, visibly around thirty, who turned to me
and smiled. When I came in she made several steps toward me and with a gesture
she showed be to sit at the leather sofa. The receptionist smiled as fake as he
was a clown and closed the door. In this room I spent a lot of time, it was
nearly ten when I was given a separate room, where I was going to have the most
miraculous night in my life! My second birth!
"Yakob, everything is done automatically - hope this will not scare you. When
you want us to discharge you at Monday we will install the software today. For
you to have time to get used to it. And tomorrow we'll make the operation." I
nodded.
"And the installation... how does it go?"
She thrust her hand in her pocket and took out a booklet with instructions.
After she looked at the table of contents she opened at a page and handed me the
booklet.
"It doesn't hurt. The system will start at twelve and will implant a connector
at the back of your head. From this point on everything will be done remotely.
Our team will watch the installation program. It will first make the right
hemisphere of your brain more active, and after that it will take up with the
settings of the psychology... "
"Hm, like setting a TV program, huh?", I smiled.
"Yes, like setting the channel."
I gave the booklet back to her. She had already went through the same operation
and there were no complications. For me there wouldn't be as well. After she
went away the lamps turned down and I must have fallen asleep.
***
Yyaaana....
Yaaaaaa.....
na......
Yana? Yana? Yana?
"Yana?"
"Yes..."
"Wake up. Report to James that she is awake. We start now. 1-2-3 test. Yana, I'm
recording everything that we are talking for the aims of the research."
"Aha..."
"Yana?"
"Yes..."
"You are awake already. Look at me."
Yana opened her eyes slowly and turned them to the man at the chair. He was
young, with brown hair and light eyes.
"Bravo, Yana! You are our heroine", he smiled. "How do you feel?"
"I cannot move... turn..." she wobbled.
"Yes. On your back there are still some things. You should not move. Does
anything hurt?"
"I think... I think no."
Not till now had Yana looked carefully at the man in front of her. Blue eyes. He
was incredibly handsome! So handsome that she felt embarrassed and she stretched
her hand to her face. She probably looked terrible!
"You are beautiful, Yana...", he said that as if he had read her thoughts, "one
of the most beautiful women I have seen". After that he gave a wink at her and
stepped to the door. "Now take more rest."
***
When she woke up she was alone. She inspected the entire wall before she dared
to stretch her arm to see if there were more "some things" on her back - there
weren't. She couldn't feel any. At the back of her head too. She raised
slightly. She was feeling strangely... light. Underneath the sheets there was a
hose showing and it ended somewhere at the floor. She raised to see it -
catheter.
Yana carefully sat. She was completely naked. Only her breasts were covered with
something like a cloth, very tight and reaching close to her abdomen. She
touched it over and she thought that there stone-like. She looked at them for
long. Then she took the hose with two fingers and jerkily pulled it. "Holly
heavens!", she felt it slipping out of her and, not that it hurt, but she got
frightened. Then she threw it on the ground.
She got up slowly, very slowly and she saw slippers next to the bed. When she
turned she saw some morning gown hanging at the door. Yana put the slippers on
and went to it. After she covered herself she stood for a while and then she
took the plunge to open the door. She went out into a very light corridor, with
many windows through which the other wing of the building could be seen and the
garden between the two. She was at the endmost room. The next door at the right
was a bathroom, there was a sign outside. Without any thinking she went that way
- in every bathroom there's a mirror!
Yana was becoming to realize what had happened and she didn't have any, any
patience to see! She locked the door and... next to her there was a big mirror,
an entire wall mirror! Her hair... what a long hair! She smiled and she tossed
it aside. She came closer and started touching her face - her pencilled
eyebrows, so beautiful eyebrows and her eyes.. they were bigger and even
playful. She straighten up again and she looked at herself, she looked down...
She untied the morning down and moved it aside, there was... she had... it
was... Her!!! It was her! She didn't dare to take of the cloth of her breasts.
She touched, pressed her legs - they were so gentle... Jeez, what a baby!
Bonbon!
She startled when somebody knocked at the door. Quickly she covered herself,
unlocked and then passed by a guy. She noticed that he turned after her. How
would he - she was the most beautiful, for Heaven's sake, the most beautiful!
When she returned in her room Yana took off the gown again and she got closer to
the window. The curtains were nearly closed and the light going through them was
drawing at her skin. She slowly slipped her hand on her stomach, to the
corrugation of her leg. It was so smooth that for a moment she felt like kissing
herself. She felt every millimeter, she caressed herself, and then she bend down
and started examining her legs. She sat on the floor. She felt like getting
excited by herself and she got embarrassed. That's enough! That's me.
At the table near the window there were plenty of beauty magazines from which
she felt unexpectedly attracted. She got up, took them and wrapped herself up in
the bed.
***
All the evening two men are staying constantly around her, asking her questions
and again recording everything. When they went away a man in white came in who
told her he was the one who operated her. He asked her to take a look at her
body.
"You van take down the bandage of the breast. There will not be scars. Just as
you don't have down..."
"I haven't had a wound cured so fast..."
"We hadn't make a single cut in this operation. E.g. what we did was from inside
- it is being watched at a monitor, and there are no scares after. However you
should not make sex at least a month. There will be a control check and we'll
decide weather you are ready."
"Naturally"
"It's not natural", the doctor smiled. "And if however you get a boyfriend
you'll make up something. Tell him that you are being examined and you should
not make sex."
This sounded very fun to Yana and laughing she said "Of course, examined."
"The nurse will tell you more for the purely women's things that you must now.
You won't have menstruation... "
The nurse came soon after the doctor was gone and long time she was explaining
to her hygiene things, face packs and similar women's things. She recommended a
hairdresser to her.
"You can choose your clothes by yourself. But for to look nice when you go from
here I can give you one-two of my dresses." Then she added, "..sell to you."
"That would be great, thanks."
Monday I put on shoes on high heels and black dress to my knees. At my waist
there was an iron belt which seemed to more uncomfortable than all the other
things. Alone I made coil of my hair and the nurse put make up on me. When I
started walking in the beginning it was a nightmare, I was constantly tottering
or I was walking like a horse. I walked two times around the parking until I
so-so get used to it. In fact, it was a technique - first you step on your toes
and when your heel reaches the ground you move all the weight on it. In that way
the hip was moving more... naturally.
I came closer to the car which was all covered with mud for the two days staying
here. I could hardly close the door when I got in - how could I have banged it
like that before! I had the feeling it will fall. I had taken the instructions
of the software and I decided to read them now because at home... my ex-home...
I probably wouldn't be able to. And I had many things to do today - apartment,
cloths, make-up...
I tucked away the certificate proving my new identity and I turned to the first
page of the instructions. It was written that it's main purpose is to prevent
the conflict He-She in operations like mine. Change-it. Well, gentlemen, your
software works. Just hope it's not some kind of shareware, ha-ha-hah! Yes, I
feel great!
I put the shoes off and started the engine. It was a luck that there was no one
at home so I could quickly pack what I needed and put it inside the car.
***
A month later I was working as a secretary in a small company. The boss was
constantly wooing me. I was trying to stop being vulgar. Soon I passed the
medial check where they proved everything was OK. I could make sex and I was
impatient to it. I was attracted in some strange way to the men in the office, a
feeling I have never had before. The nurse warned me to beware of that. And to
behave as it is proper for a beauty - proud. That was why I got a boyfriend and
I was trying to be faithful... as much as it was possible. I liked it very much
when someone was pronouncing my name: Yana, Yana, or calling me Kitten and
Sunshine.
After some time my boyfriend even proposed marriage to me! Than I tore up with
him. I tried to explain him but... he didn't understand. I was thinking that I
really fall in love with someone then I'll marry him. We will walk our way
together, shoulder to shoulder. And I will be Yana, his wife. It was strange but
now I didn't think it was funny. From long time ago I knew that this was meant
to be since my birth. I must have grown up like this. And everything that
happened in my "previous" life was just a mistake of destiny. Now everything was
alright.
When I was reading Yakob's notes from time to time, I was thinking on him as on
a brother, with love. But I was feeling him a bit... distant. I was feeling him
dead.
***
One evening when I was going home after work I got into a traffic jam. Behind me
a guy was blowing the horn, and when he came closer to me he put his window
down:
"Hey, kitten, what are you waiting for!" - "F... you, asshole!" If only I could
tell you this, if only I were a man now!
In that second I realized there was a bug in the program. Or in the human way of
thinking. Would it be men's or women's. There was a bug.
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