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Daisy May's Fastball
Daniel W. Kneip
Daisy Mays gripped the ball in a real fancy way then with a great big howdy-do,
she arced her arm back then looped it forward and her wrist practically snapped
right off as she released the ball and it traveled ferociously toward home
I don't believe the batter ever saw it coming! The ball landed squarely in the
mitt of the catcher, who winked at Daisy Mays and yelled, "One more sister! Give
'er one more of them hot potatoes!"
Now at bat was someone prominent in the batting world. Jordan Belue, who stood
six feet tall if he stood an inch, eyed Daisy Mays with passion. Not only did he
want to kill her, he wanted to hit that savage ball right out of her world! And
he would have one last chance as the umpire reminded everyone "Steeeeeeeerike
twoooo!" then he added, kindly, "You get one more pitch then you're out, Sonny."
But Jordan already knew that. He wasn't dumb. But he WAS quite angry! He didn't
mind if a female struck him out, but if a female bird struck him out, he'd
probably never show his ugly face in public again! And that would hurt
But she was a hen who had a mean fastball. Not much more can be said about her.
And not too many hitters had found an answer for her screwball either - and
those were just the basic pitches. She also had in her repertoire, the
"Jimmy-Over-Under", the "Ball-Ball", and the "Sweetie Pie" - all of which were
treacherous pitches in their own right.
Jordan didn't care. He had it set in his mind that he would hit the next thing
that flew his way! And this time, I think he meant it and he yelled at her, "You
better not get too fond of that ball, Missy!" and then he growled!
So Daisy Mays gave the ball a very special smile and she even whispered
something in it's ear before winding back and heaving a miracle pitch toward
Jordan locked eyes with the ball and prepared to swing just as the ball
screeched to an awesome stop, in mid-air, right in front of home plate, and a
secret hatch opened and a tiny green Martian stepped out, made a quick survey
and said, "We've repaired our console and must leave now!" and with that, the
hatch closed and the ball soared off into the sky and the game was forfeited.
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