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The Adventures of Brat Cat part 2


Clive Michie

Man what way to start the day, I feel panic stricken. I stretched out a hind leg and gave a few licks around the paw. A spark leaps to the metal latch on the window sill. Static electricity I hate it - why does there have to be so much static in the winter, making my fur stick to me, it makes me not want to step off this wool mat where I make my perch to view the world in safety.

I stand and with my front legs out as far in front of me and back legs straight I place my chest on the ground doing a big stretch and releasing a purr. Jumping from my sill I hit the floor with a thud then saunter off to the kitchen to see what my hosts have left in my bowl from their plates - nothing. Whatís this, fancy cat meal, yummy my favourite liver and fish heads.

Two minutes later I find my self in the living room jumping up on the couch to spend a successful day cat napping or snickering at the stupid dogs in the snow when all of a sudden I smell something - something I have not smelt since birth. It is a smell that would send the strongest cat to fear for their very existence. It is the elders, in this end of town; they never come to this end of town. I wondered what they are doing so far from the river and the old bridge. These fee lions are very intimidating and have total reign over all they see, they carried a lot of weight and they controlled most of the green area where houses where banned it seems or something, maybe cause of these feared fee lions I think.

One of the smaller people came down stairs and walked over to me and said Hi purr, kitty kitty how are ya brat cat and rubs my head. This causes an uncontrollable vibration from my chest that resonates in a loud purr and causes me to come to attention and raise my head. He opens his hand and moves toward my face as if attacking so I assume the stance and when he is close enough I give him a full wrap around with paws and claws but I do not hurt him he is the only one that pays any attention to me or talks to me the others just take me to bad places where I get big needles, bad tasting food, and smelly soap.

Alright the mini human must leave the house and thatís my chance to see what is going on. So after a knife with butter hits the floor and a glass of spilt milk he heads for the door. Crap I wanted that milk but I must know what is going on, I must get out. Can Banger will know he has connections in that clan of elders. The door opens and woosh I am in the clear he never even seen me leave. Hugging the railing I move to the side of the house besides the railing and study the ground. Any cat will tell you that you need to dry and cool off the paw pads before walking on metal or even cold concrete or you might become connected to it. I look over the edge and find my point of contact and quickly do the math. I study the Jump, height, power, correction for wind currents skid factor and grip potential with and with out claws and so on Ė you donít think cats can just make a perfect jump without a little study of the situation do you? I had to make sure I miss the snow bank Ė I remember that poor little kitten found in the snow bank in spring, what a terrible way to go.

I jump off the porch and a perfect jump if I may add. I run skipping through the back yard feeling playful in the snow to the path ways behind the houses. If the elders are here in the centre of town they will be going to see Can Banger.

Banger lives on the next block and I must cross a road to get to him. Thank the almighty sphinx that rush hour is over. I can clear this road in less than 3 seconds and bolt to the other side. Halfway down the alley I notice 6 cats out back of Bangers and walk over to join them. I didnít know them so I didnít join in their vigil I just walked through the hole in the fence and approached the house. Banger was standing like a proud guard at the rear entrance to the meeting place under this old house. He snapped his head around at me and with eyes wide open and a look that sent a shiver down my spine, I froze. Banger made it perfectly clear I would not be welcome in the yard for this meeting and I quickly returned to the alley to join the vigil.

Hello I am pu pur ahh I mean Brat Cat how are my fellow fee lions this momentous day. No response from them so I directed my attention to a cool looking well tanned Siamese. Hello there I donít think we have met. The Siamese turned to me and in their normal I am better then you attitude. Hello you right we havenít perhaps thatís the first right thing you have ever said. So whatís going on do you know? No she said but I think there is some new threat to the community here why else do the elder travel so far to meet with our unofficial leader Banger he wasnít even appointed by the fee lion tribunal. So how many do you sense I get about eight elders. She looked at me and said sarcastically youíve been sniffing to many carpet fibbers or maybe that air freshener you are wearing causes your nose to be inferior to mine. There are fourteen there now maybe the largest meeting in all of my time. She went on to say that Spike told her and she glanced over at Spike, seeing her glance he began to clean him self violently. Whatís wrong with him I asked? He gets nerves around good looking fee lions like me. But it is rude to do a cleaning in mixed company I added. She replied that it is a psychological problem and that I should just drop it Ė hmmm maybe she has a thing for him, oh well she is really not my type.

It seemed like hours that we waited to get answers. When the meeting was finally over, and the elders where leaving, one looked over at me as if to be pleased to see me. I froze with fear. It is not proper to make eye contact with the elders as they see this as a challenge and it would be a short fight, lets face it these lions are use to eating fresh meat and not just birds they get jack rabbits and it is said they even ate a dog one time but that is myth and not a published fact. It is true the elders are terrifying but they always have the community best interests at heart it seemed.

Banger came to the entrance and waved for us to enter. I had not noticed that the six cats where now over twenty, we entered the yard to the meeting hall.

Part One

To be continued.

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